How
to Teach Kids Perseverance and Goal-Setting
7 Goal-Setting Strategies
At
some time or another, everyone experiences this with their kids…they
seem to have potential, whether in their school work or a sport they love, but
they either do not want to study or to practice their skill. Sometimes boys or
girls just cannot focus.
All
parents share that sense of frustration when their child doesn't try
hard enough to accomplish something they know s/he's perfectly capable of. What
can you do? One way to foster a can-do attitude is to help your child learn to
set goals and meet them, one small step at a time.
Don't
get too excited: You probably won't be able to get your child to start aiming
for straight A's right away. That kind of goal would be a major
challenge for a pre-teen. But experts say this is an ideal time to introduce
your child to the concept of establishing targets and working toward them. Try
these strategies to teach your child the power of goal setting so s/he'll
eventually learn how to work to achieve his best.
Get
the Idea Across Start
the process by looking for ways that your child already uses goal-setting
techniques. If you notice that your son has managed to save up his
money to buy a video game, for example, discuss the steps he needed to take to
get what he wanted. Talk to him about how good it feels to accomplish something
that you've worked toward. Then, discuss how these same techniques can be used
to meet other challenges.
Start
Small Help
your child think of a fun goal she could achieve within a short time.
Maybe she could finish a book she started or complete a craft project. Experts
say that little goals are the best way to get kids moving towards big
goals. When a kid meets a goal, they get
an incredible surge of energy.
Let
Them Choose As
much as you might want your child to make the honor roll, it's best to let your
kid decide what she wants to achieve. Then you can help her make a plan.
Some goals require more input from you. If learning to figure skate is your
kid's dream, you're going to have to help her set and achieve her targets. If
parents find they're nagging or getting angry that their child isn't working
hard enough to meet a goal, that's a signal they need to back off.
Be
Alert to Possibilities If
your child says, "I wish I could win a prize in the science fair this
year," use it as an opportunity to assist him in creating a plan.
Help him write down specific action steps and a timetable for accomplishing
this goal. Then check in with him from
time to time to help keep him focused on his targets.
Show
Them How Adults have a much greater sense of what it takes to
accomplish goals. So include your child in your own goal-setting to show her
how the process works. Say you want to create a garden. Get your child involved
in everything from researching plants to turning the dirt. Adults know how to
break a goal down into steps, and that's something kids need to learn.
Provide
a Reality Check Children
often underestimate how hard it can be to meet a goal,
and then they get frustrated and discouraged when they fall short. If your
child decides he wants to play the guitar, for instance, be encouraging but
realistic. Point out the challenges and the dedication it will require. The
idea isn't to make the goal seem too daunting, but rather to share in the
seriousness of the undertaking by helping plan it out.
Applaud
Effort As
your child begins to set goals and work toward them, don't forget the
compliments. Say something like, "I'm really
impressed. When you care about something you really go after it!"
Perseverance Adhering
to a course of action, a belief, or a purpose, especially in spite of
difficulties, obstacles, or discouragement.
When
we persevere, we:
* Do our best with
what we have.
* Keep trying; we
don't quit or give up easily.
* Never make
excuses for obstacles that get in the way of getting something done. Instead we
look for ways to remove or work around the obstacles.
"The Race." This poem exemplifies perseverance.
The last few lines of the poem read:
For all of life is like a
race, with ups and downs and all.
And all you have to do to
win is rise each time you fall.
"Quit!"
"Give up, you're beaten!" They still shout in my face.
But another voice within
me says,"GET UP AND WIN THE RACE!"
Spend
some time with your child explaining the importance of "staying the
course" and doing the best you can. And, read "The
Race" together. You will be glad you did.
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